Zen

I am standing on the ideal that I should be as positive as possible during my pregnancy. I have barely begun and that seems like it could be a daunting task already.

A great conversation last night (that was actually not on this subject whatsoever) reminded me that I am an old soul. I know what I'm doing even if I have never done it before. I should trust myself. All of us need to be reminded to trust our instincts.  Don't get me wrong, I am still going to read every baby book on the planet and call my mom constantly.

I am going to channel my inner hippie, focus my chi, find my peaceful Buddhist, and focus on karma. OK so thats a bit excessive, but you get my point. Since I discovered my pregnancy I have been a little witchy, in good ways and bad.  Poor Hubby has dealt with the already apparent grumpiness and has helped me curb it so far and the pretty much covers the bad witchy. On the positive side, I have put a knot in rope. That doesnt sound like much does it, knotted rope?            Green rope = Fertility and growth  Knot = Represents baby

Make more sense? It should. I have it wrapped up in a baby blanket and use them both for positive meditation and visualization. I recommend anyone who is having any worries to visualize themselves encircled by angels. Its amazing.

I am nervous, for multiple reasons. Some of which I cannot discuss here for it would most likely become cannon fodder. Its still surreal, this thought, I am pregnant. I say it nearly everyday. Like I'm trying to believe it, trying make make sure its real. I am excited, maybe too excited. I want to start doing everything now. Which is a bit ridiculous but I can't help it.

The hubs is back to work so I have all the time in the world to read, write draw, and learn to paint. OK I know how to paint just not as well as I'd like. The point is I have time. Time to do everything just right...

On the not so bright side....  I'm nauseous, exhausted and breaking out.  Glowing my ass. Its all  worth it I know.
244 days to go (approximate)