I have my Christmas shopping done. Its been done for more than a week now. Well, most of it. All but two people. I think this is a testament to just how blah I have been feeling.
I am a space cadet on a normal day. It fits me. Lately I have been right on track with the normal trappings of life and thats not me. *sigh* Usually I am a last minute, oops I forgot type of gal. Though things come together in the end usually with a good story or two.
I am in the process of rebuilding. Its a slow process and i was on the wrong path for a while. I began comparing myself to people who I thought were similar to me. I thought "how could these people be better at being me, than me?" Joy by comparison is not real joy.
I have grown as a person, I am at a different stage in my life and growth then the people I was comparing myself to. Not better or worse, just different.
This blankness can best be described as a growing pain. Reformatting myself.
I am a space cadet on a normal day. It fits me. Lately I have been right on track with the normal trappings of life and thats not me. *sigh* Usually I am a last minute, oops I forgot type of gal. Though things come together in the end usually with a good story or two.
I am in the process of rebuilding. Its a slow process and i was on the wrong path for a while. I began comparing myself to people who I thought were similar to me. I thought "how could these people be better at being me, than me?" Joy by comparison is not real joy.
I have grown as a person, I am at a different stage in my life and growth then the people I was comparing myself to. Not better or worse, just different.
This blankness can best be described as a growing pain. Reformatting myself.
Man, I soooo relate to those growing pains! I get WAY to competitive and comparative and it never fails to bring you down.
ReplyDeleteI feel like I just got over a major hurdle like that myself. I hope you come out functioning awesomely and however you view that to be...