Thursday, June 23, 2011

Headache hospitalization...

I spent most of today in pain. I'm not asking for sympathy, it is just a fact.

All in all it was completely worth it... 

I spent a few hours in Labor and delivery today. I couldn't see straight and bits of my body were either tingling or just plain numb. All of my test came back perfect... healthy... right where I should be. Wonderful words to hear. I spent a good 6 hours listening to miss lyla's heart beat beat beat away. The look on Robs face was pure amazement. she was showing no stress, perfect vital signs. My pain wasn't causing her any distress. I was relieved right there.  That was all I needed, my pain didn't matter 

That is such a powerful feeling. I have felt such relief seeing Rob come out of pain, but this isn't that same. I would certainly take his pain away if I could. He wouldn't let me, but still. If I was responsible for her being in pain, I would be devastated. Of course at this point I would be the only reason she would be in pain, whether I had control over it or not.  Odd new feeling. Powerful. 

Its amazing how you can love something that you have never met. Even if it just is a chemical reaction.

I was worried from the beginning that I wouldn't have a healthy pregnancy.

 Lets face facts, I'm a big girl and I like candy... gummy candy... the worst frickin kind. I was terrified I would become a slave to my cravings. I expected to balloon up like it was nobody's business. The bigger you are the less you have to gain during the pregnancy but the more chance you have to gain it. More often than not big girls have some eating issues... at least moderation issues.  I don't always eat healthy but I do more often than not. I crave (pregnant or not) vegetables, oddly enough. I love broccoli, asparagus, sugar snap peas, hell I even like lima beans. Problem is I like fast food just as much. I have only gained what I've needed so far. No extra weight... perfect. Doc says I'm easy.

Doc keeps using that word, perfect. I love hearing it. I worried about her, with my horrible hips and Robs patchy health history., how could she be healthy? She is so far *knock on wood*. I'm not asking for an easy baby, just a healthy one. Frankly I think we deserve it.
 Who would have thought a hospital visit would have turned out so... perfect.

I have a recording of the heartbeat... when my head stops hurting and I figure out how to post it w/o being magic I will.

1 comment: